It’s 8:30 on a Friday night in L.A., and I’m at home. Not my home, but the place where I’m staying while I’m stuck here. I’ve got about $15 in the bank, and I’m monitoring EBay, trying to sell a pair of Stacy Adams Oak Madison’s I found on the bus! My whiskey is almost gone and I’m contemplating whether I can afford the $5.99 for another 5th of Prestige Edition Blended Whiskey. Of Course I will but if I get it tonight it will most doubtingly be gone by Sunday, when I really need it for the Wrestling Pay Per View that I plan on watching illegally online. I’m also searching desperately for a place to watch Green Lantern streaming because I don’t want to download it on my girlfriends laptop. She would get super pissed if I got a virus from some bogus torrent and until I sell those shoes I found I won’t have enough money to see it in the theater.
At the same time I’m dying from lack of funds, I have been having an amazing time out her. Thanks to my friends over at Gynomite! I’ve been able to attend some of the hottest comedy events in Los Angeles, and meet some of the coolest people as well. I have also explored nearly all of the city with my bus pass, walking around all by my lonesome snapping pic after pic and trying to feel relevant by actually using Twitter for something other than re-posting Tumblr post. I feel like I have seen nearly all of L.A. Well all of L.A. that won’t get me shot or arrested for being black. I’ve yet to see South Central or Beverly Hills. I guess that’s why I’ve seen so few African-Americans or Caucasians! I feel like by the time I leave here I will be fluent in Spanish and able to read Korean.
Aside from being allowed access into the up and coming comics scene, I also went out to the local Pride parade, and it just made me miss SF even more. Where as back in the Bay, Gay-Day is the biggest craziest parade that gives everyone the excuse to get naked and act a fool in the middle of the street. L.A.’s parade was tame even lame by comparison, just a bunch of old queens and gray haired lesbians with their families politely clapping to some tired local celebrities and a grocery store truck! I was highly disappointed, but not every city is going to set aside a day for people to fornicate in the streets! Being down here has made me realize how good we have it in SF, and how spoiled its made me. I think if I had came to L.A. from North Carolina or even Atlanta, the distance you have to travel to get anywhere or the vast ocean of concrete you would have to walk to hoof it anywhere, wouldn’t seem quite as bad. But it would still suck. This city simply isn’t designed to be walker friendly.
I’ve walked quite a bit, down Sunset, Hollywood, Wilshire. I’ve walked through Chinatown, Japan-town, and Toy Town! I’ve seen the Tar Pits from that one episode of Futurama, but I didn’t find Pauly Shores head. I walked around the LAMCA but unfortunately didn’t have enough money to go in an see the Tim Burton exhibit. Hopefully I will before I leave! I’ve ventured out to Echo Park and looked at some ducks and swans, and a ton of trash on the ground. Found an enclave of hipsters, and some beautiful graffiti. And yesterday I saw a very old Peter Murphy play with his man boobs for free a in-store performance at the L.A. Amoeba which is actually bigger than the one in the Haight.
The thing is this is all a test. I have yet to pass, and it looks like I didn’t study. The test is weather or not I can survive in the world on my own, with no female benefactor taking care of me and paying all my bills. I have to stand on my own for two months and get a gig, and feed myself. I have to show my girl back in SF that I can be a man. Then when I return I have to do it again. In this new economy it is becoming more and more difficult. I had an interview this morning, and the first thing that my interviewer remarked on was how it appears I move around a lot I tried to message is fears and pretend as best I could that I was here to stay in L.A. Already I am at a disadvantage for not speaking Spanish and having a Social Security Card. Two things that seem to work against kitchen workers in California in general. It will be much of the same when I return to SF. It won’t be easy, I just have to keep at it and grind as hard as I can. In the meantime I am pulling every internet game I can aside from some Nigerian Prince scam.