Thus the gods and others have procreated millions of such noble souled Vaanaras as the chiefs of warriors who can change their guise at their wish. Those Vanara generals who took birth thus became the prominent generals among the principle battalions of monkeys, and they have also procreated brave monkeys on their own.
-Valmiki Ramayana – Bala Kanda in Prose Sarga 17
It seems India is experiencing a bit of a problem with Monkees these days. From Monkees over running towns and attacking people, to stealing trains and running amok in general, they are even planning on a special school for “rouge” Monkees. In New Delhi the government is forming a special squad to deal with the “Monkee menace”. In Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia Monkees have taken over a park. In Brazil a new species of Monkee has been discovered, while in America a Monkey is caught on camera stealing plants and concrete statues from a flower shop in Texas. In Pennsylvania a Monkey has learned to operate a robot with its brain. And in Africa monkeys are being used to create a vaccine against the Swine Flu. Some see this as a startling new trend. We the Armada understand that this is our doing, we have long foretold of our return to power. Why is that so much of the monkey related news is emanating from India, and Asia? Why is it that in those places the Monkee menace is becoming so proactively violent and ferocious? It is the return of the Vanara. Created by Brahma the Vanara’s are strong and powerful with many godly traits made to fight battles. According to the Ramayana, taking orders from Brahma, the gods agreed to parent sons in the semblance of Monkees. The Vanaras took birth in bears and Monkees, attaining the shape and valor of the gods and goddesses who created them. After Vanaras are created they began to organize into armies and spread across the forests and some, including Lord Hanuman stayed near mount Riskshavat where the Vanaras procreated. According to the Ramayana, the Vanaras lived primarily in the region of Kishkindha in present-day southern India, in the midst of Dandaka Forest, where Lord Rama met them during his search for Sita. The Vanaras helped Rama in his search, and in his battle against the demon Ravana. “Thus the gods have procreated many thousands of such valorous and guise changing monkeys who with their immeasurable strength and bravery are manifest for the elimination of the decahedral demon Ravana.” As described in the epic, the characteristics of the Vanara include being amusing, childish, mildly irritating, badgering, hyperactive, adventurous, bluntly honest, loyal, courageous, and kind. Though believe to be extinct they are not. These are our ancestors, from which came Lord Hanuman, and the great Kings Sugriva a Vali. Now is our time and we are beginning to reclaim the Earth from the wretched Hue-man scum.
It was the Varanas whom built the Nala Sethu-the bridge to Sri Lanka, so that Rama may rescue his beloved Sita. This is your Monkee heritage, nobility, honor, loyalty, and a fighting spirit unmatched. Warriors born, The Armada is merely an extension of this tradition. These current stories surrounding Monkees is just the beginning in the coming years we will become stronger. Those who believe us to be at war with the robots are mistaken, we will become one with the machines and defeat mankind once and for all, for they are the abomination which dishonors the Gods while were are the faithful who will end the foolishness of monotheism and reveal to all the true nature of the cosmos. It is our destiny, and our duty!
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